Thursday, 26 October 2006

I am a lazy Bastard

Yes i am. It is almost Halloween. And i have not posted here for some time.

I have been doing many things, including playing Guild Wars, messing with google products, creating other blogs for messing around and becoming a dad.

I just could not be arsed writing anything on this blog.

I will try to get things together again. Soon. Very Soon.

Oh i like the blogger beta. If only they would do something about the Goggle webspace - it is really quite shit at the moment and really needs to have template access.

Friday, 1 September 2006

The Ninja will see you now

Dr McNinja will see you now I have been reading this one for a while now - and i love The Adventures of Dr McNinja - a ninja who's a doctor. The title kinda gives it away.

The drawings are good quality black and white with some seriously bizarre storylines.

Cross dressing He-Man

Came across this little beauty of a webcomic. Some strips are funny some are so-so. I liked this one where He-Man gets to cross dress. Hehehehehe http://www.biggercheese.com/index.php?comic=643

Thursday, 31 August 2006

1 R 1337 - retro 1980's computer gaming

I was flicking through the usual webcomics i seem to have become addicted to and found the latest offering from 'Battlebarge' - a webcomic about a gaming shop. And on that page i found sometihing i thought lost forever - an updated version of Elite, the space faring gaimg from the 1980s.

Elite was an amzing game for its time. The graphics were very basic but very advanced at the same time. All the 3d modeling was rendered in lines - there was no filling in and therefore no blocky graphics or lurid colours - it was mostly black and white. The premise was simple - become someone ranked 'Elite'. That was it. No railroading through a terrible plot, no silly destiny, just a Cobra MKiii ship, you as the captain, a Universe to explore and trading to be done. That was it.

There was complete open-endedness throughout. You could just trade a lot between worlds, take out pirates or become a fugitive.

Now it is back and for free for the PC. Well, it is back with a load of different 'Elites'. There were 3 official 'Elite' titles, the original one called 'Elite' (Well, duh!), 'Frontier Elite 2', and 'Frontier: First Encounters'. There is also a version, which i have downloaded called 'Oolite' and seems to be fairly straight forward for a computer ludite like me.

Definitely visit, download and have a go.

Tuesday, 29 August 2006

Magmatrax - the Jawdropping Juggernaut

I was surfing the net - as you do - and came across a start to finish description (with photos - very important) of how Vincent Hudon (a.k.a. Boltman) built and painted his Juggernaut of Khorne with champion.

He used a number of effective techniques that i can only dream about and created a thing of beauty.
I really suggest going to the website at The Making of Magmatrax

Saturday, 19 August 2006

Monday, 14 August 2006

Further Developments on the web

In my quest for new gadgetry and all things weblike I have become reaquianted with an old friend.

With so many free online publishing widgets now I thought i would have a wee look around. I really like the idea of entering information directly into the browser, hitting the publish button and seeing it on the web where everyone can see it too. It is a fantastic move forward from ftping it from my computer onto a site. It means i can update (when i can be arsed) my site from anywhere. I like this new gift of mobility.

Blogger is a brillant little tool. It is because of Blogger that you are having to wade through this crap!

I have looked at others but I went with blogger because it is quite simple to use but still has backend functionality (I can piss about with the code) however, it has ignited something else with me. I want more.

I found what i thought was it at Hubpages but it is still in beta and i think has a way to go yet - although i think it is quite nifty and likeable. Unfortunately its little money making scheme is putrely based for US consumption and in trying to get a little UK action i think i broke my page!! My hub pages are at
http://hubpages.com/hub/WeegamersNI. As you can see they seem a bit cluttered. But i think the idea is sound.

Then i came across
bravenet.com. When i first created webpages one of the big things to try out was the guestbook. I found bravenet and used their guestbook links. I also used other bits and pieces from them. It seemed good stuff anyway. Though i got fed up with webing for a while and took my pages down. In my search for a free website i refound bravenet and am currently messing around with it. I will let you know how i get on with it.

The main point to this is freeweb - browser based input technology is coming on in leaps and bounds. There is no excuse for not having a presence on the web, all it takes is a little imagination.

Wednesday, 9 August 2006

Goblins - another webcomic to waste time on

Got put onto this little webcomic called 'Goblins'. Very funny little comic and deserves a bit of support.

Goblins is all about a group of goblins living in DnD, al a 'The Order of the Stick'. In order to survive the vast number of adventurers that come calling on their warcamp to loot the badly locked treasure chest, they decide to become player characters and the fun then ensues.

There are a number of good plots going on and though many of the strips are self contained they realy fit into an overarching storyline. More and more background is coming through and the references are very funny.

Give it a try. I give it 8 out of ten.

Friday, 28 July 2006

Fantasy writer Gemmell dies at 57

This was forwarded to me by a friend. Very sad news indeed.

I have read quite a few of David Gemmell's novels including Legend, Waylander and the Bloodstone series. A real 'boy's own' writer with a mature dark edge.

I await some of them being made into films.

The BBC have a report with links to other relevant sites.
Click here to go to the BBC site.

Advice for Imperial citizens int he 41st millenium (40K)

I have put together a few pointers on the does and don'ts in the 41st millenium. Some I have rogued and adjusted from the 40k forums on the GW website, others i have kinda made up, some ok and some not so ok.

If you have any further suggestions, please leave them in the comments box.

Thanks.



Advice for Imperial citizens in the 41st millenium

  1. Asbestos gloves do not give any added protection when using plasma weapons
  2. Friendly fire…….isn’t.
  3. ‘Terminator tipping’ is frowned upon.
  4. Do not challenge Ork speed freaks to a drag race, unless you are a Blood Angel.
  5. Ordo Soritas do not take kindly to being referred to as ‘bolter bitches’.
  6. Do not use flamethowers as cigarette lighters, campfire lighters, or ‘added special effects’ at an imperial entertainment event.
  7. Likewise do not use a melta weapon to microwave ready meals.
  8. Squigs are not ‘meals on wheels’
  9. Tau do not taste like chicken, nor do kroot
  10. The Crozius Arcanum is a holy implement for smiting the Emperor’s enemies, not a sex toy.
  11. Land raiders are indeed ‘bullet magnets’. Use wisely.
  12. Gaunts are not pets.
  13. Necrons are not cybermen, and will not say ‘Prepare to be deleted’.
  14. There are no ointments for a scarab infestation.
  15. Titans are not to be used for ‘dance offs’
  16. There is no room on a rhino for spoilers, under chassis neon lighting, sport rims, extra large exhaust pipes, dump valves, or turbos. Unless it is a Blood Angels rhino, in which case the only stipulation is there should be no fuzzy dice.
  17. No fuzzy dice or air fresheners are allowed in any imperial vehicle.
  18. Do not refer to the Machine spirit in vehicles as the ‘Ghost in the Machine’
  19. Necrons are NOT controlled by skynet.
  20. Do not throw sticks and ask a Space Wolf to fetch. His reaction often offends
  21. There is no point in torturing Slannesh followers. They only enjoy it.
  22. Followers of the Blood God do not appreciate being referred to as Quorn berserkers.
  23. Mr Lordi is not a Bloodthirster. He is the lead singer for Lordi. There is a minor difference.
  24. Blood Angels will not be in a good mood if ‘Dracula’ is quoted to them in an over the top Romanian accent.
  25. Dark Angels are not ‘Alter Boys’ nor are they transvestites.
  26. Ultramarines are not extras from a bad American or British elite forces movie.
  27. Ultramarines do not take kindly to being referred to as ‘Gay’ or ‘Beardy girls’.
  28. Deamonettes of Slannesh are not ‘goers’, nor should they ever be propositioned. There are no STD clinics in the Emperium. You have been warned
  29. The taint of Chaos is not an STD. Avoid at all costs.
  30. No in-vehicle cd players. This only encourages “the Best of Queen” to be played constantly.
  31. Venerable Dreadnoughts do not like it when people call them Vulnerable Dreadnoughts.
  32. The Eldar Avatar is no longer scary. Assault cannon his ass!!
  33. Do not place any ‘I am a heretic. Purge me’ stickers on the back of Inquisitors.
  34. Never, ever quote Monty Python in front of Inquisitors. Imperial Inquisitors do NOT use fluffy pillows or the ‘comfy chair’ during interrogation. You have been warned.
  35. Powerpoint(tm) does not ignore armour saves. However, you must make a morale test at -5.

Thursday, 27 July 2006

First Weegamers poll results

I am also closing the first poll of the blog and the results below are as follows

  1. Pen and Paper RPG------------- 3 votes
  2. Computer RPG ------------------7 votes
  3. Boardgames ---------------------6 votes
  4. Card games ----------------------7 votes
  5. Tabletop Miniature games -------2 votes

Hmmmm. The old style RPG in this very unscientific poll has taken a minor hammering as has tabletop games. Boardgames come out very well as does computer RPGs and card games.

I suspect ease of use, speed of play and interactivity have something to do with this.

Please see the new poll for more voting fun!!


Games Moneyshop, or should that be Games NoMoreMonenyshop

Games Workshop has just found itself dumped with a 73% drop in profits. Mostly blamed on a fall in Lord of the Rings sales and the amount of investment they have made.

Part of me says "serves you right for the amount of money you charge for a couple of pieces of plastic" and another part of me worries that if it all goes kaput then how will i maintain my GW games fix??

I don't think they are goning to go away any time soon, but it is slightly worrying that they keep putting the prices up when the prices for models are already over-inflated. Staff get a 50% discount - that's a hell of a discount - on GW stuff. But then again they are on fairly shit pay.

I am rediscovering 40K (much to the dispair of my wife and bank account) and am building up a space marine army and a chaos space marine army (even more rolling of eyes from the wife), though i am getting a bit of a yearning for either necrons or tyranids (NB- keep wife away from kitchen knife set and make sure hammers and miniatures are both inaccessible). I also have far too many eldar and orks at home but have never 'filled' them out with vehicles etc. God, so many miniatures and so little time to paint.

At TTN we will be creating a narrative campaign for the August month based on the Medusa campaign. A few of us have already registered and logged our first battles.

In Northern Ireland one problem has ocurred where the GW shop is linked to the Northern Europe operation while NI is still, technically, part of the UK. I and my friends have all registered for Edethor (the UK territory), but i don't think the shop can register our games as Northern Europe are fighting over another territory. Heyho, no gaming in the shop then. Its like they don't want us to turn up or something.

If anybody out there can clarify this i would be very pleased. I may even venture into the shop and ask.

I will put more info up on our campaign soon and if any of you lot wnat to join in keep your eye out on this blog and on the TTN Forum in the TTN Open board section

Wednesday, 26 July 2006

renew, renew, renew

Well, if you have been poping in every so often you will have figured out that i have not been updating.

This is because

  1. I am a lazy bastard.
  2. I could not be bothered.
  3. I had too much going on to have time to update a bloody blog.
  4. It felt like too much hard work.

I had a lot of expectations for this blog, and still do. My inspiration will return and then things will be back to normal.

Thank you for coming back.

Thursday, 22 June 2006

Rolepayers of the World UNITE!!

This explains a lot.

Just to keep you going for a while. I rogued this from the
TTN forum, and do not know where it came from but its excellent.

Apparently David Cameron, Leader to the Conservative Party (UK), and his friends are Roleplay geeks as well.

Excellent...... we will take over the world. hehehehehehehehe

On the plus side Vin Deisel is/was a rolepayer as well.

If you have come across famous RPGers stick it in a comment.

Thursday, 1 June 2006

Gone but not forgotten

Sorry I have not posted until now. A friend I knew for the past 2 or 3 years died at the weekend. So i have not really been feeling up to it.

Alan Neil was the founder and President of TTN. He began the long saga of Q-Con. He even came to mine in the Navan Centre, in Armagh.

He had a stroke. The doctors could not do anything. And yet he still thought of others, he carried a donor card.

I was not his best friend nor he mine. but he was very likeable and full of life. It could be very infectious.

He leaves a lot of people who loved him and liked him. His long term girlfriend, his long term house mate, his family and everybody else who ever met him.

He will be greatly missed. He loved Guns n Roses, but i shall quote Iron Maiden - "Only the Good die young". His was in his thirties, just like me.

I shall be attending the funeral tomorrow (2nd June 2006). Normal service will resume there after.

Tuesday, 23 May 2006

Hard Rock Hallelujah - the song that changed the world

The lyrics for the winning song.

What can I say? They speak for themselves. What the hell has that band done to me? I feel as if they have mashed my brains, sprinkled in a lttle obsession and added a little compulsiveness just to be on the safe side.

I now have a major compulsion to buy their albums.

I just can't get that bloody song out of my head. Nor the phrase 'We're all on the Lordi Express!'. Thanks Paul, you bastard.

Oh what the hell!!!! We're all on the Lordi Express! Comin' through to Winsville. Woo Woo.

Lordi is a Finnish band and, due to living in a cave in the middle of the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, don't have a TV or radio, refuse to read newspapers on account of them being to wet to read due to you living in the middle of the ocean, you have not heard them or heard of them, then might I suggest you head on over to www.lordi.org

Hard Rock Hallelujah

Hard Rock Hallelujah

Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!

The saints are crippled
On this sinners' night
Lost are the lambs with no guiding light

The walls come down like thunder
The rocks about to roll
It's the Arockalypse
Now bare your soul

All we need is lightning
With power and might
Striking down the prophets of false
As the moon is rising
Give us the sign
Now let us rise up in awe

Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God's creation supernatural high

The true believers
Thou shall be saved
Brothers and sisters keep strong in the faith
On the day of Rockoning
It's who dares, wins
You will see the jokers soon'll be the new kings

All we need is lightning
With power and might
Striking down the prophets of false
As the moon is rising
Give us the sign
Now let us rise up in awe

Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God's creation supernatural high

Wings on my back
I got horns on my head
My fangs are sharp
And my eyes are red
Not quite an angel
Or the one that fell
Now choose to join us or go straight to Hell

Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!

Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock 'n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God's creation supernatural high

Hard Rock Hallelujah!


Monday, 22 May 2006

They came. They rocked. They conquered......Eurovision

We landed at our friend’s house on the big night. Had a nice Chinese takeaway had a chat and then settled down with some drinks. The telly was turned on, tuned in to BBC1 and enjoyed the show.

The hosts, Greece, put on an opening ceremony that was bizarre and full of sea and sun motifs. I had thought that they were putting on a show for the great Cthulhu as there were a number of people dressed as deep ones (well ok they were dressed as dolphins, but it was close). Lots of singing and dancing in a build up to the show.

Then the two hosts for the evening swooped down onto the stage on wires, very exciting and different. Things were looking up. Then they started speaking, which is always a bad sign as all Eruovision hosts seem to have a really bad transatlantic accent. They introduce last years hottie, I mean winner, Helena Paparizou, gives a rendition of ‘My Number One’ to the home crowd. Very happy shiny people waving flags enthusiastically.

Then the first act. It is six4one from Switzerland. Twee and crap. We felt unmoved. OK it was OK but was far from our high expectations for the Eurovision Song Contest.

Next, Arsenium and Natalia from Moldova. He WAS an Arse and she was very pleasant on the old eyeballs. They sing a funky song, ‘Loca’. They just had to add a hip wit it, dreadlocked rapper doing stereotypical rappery things. Natalia is the star of the performance as she goes through a number of costume changes, with less and less clothing covering her every time she walked behind a sail placed on stage. You can guess we kept yelling at the tv ‘again, again.’ However, the last time she went behind the sail she came out dressed in a wedding dress. Very disappointing.

Israel’s Eddie Butler sang a gospel type song, ‘Together We Are One’. More like ‘Together we will bore the hell out of you’. ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz

Next was the most evil song ever. Is was a capella song by Cosmos from Latvia. They also looked like thay had Michael Jackson with them doing his usual moonwalking shit. They also had what can be loosely described as a ‘dancing robot’. Major tacky rubbish. We had to take off and nuke them from orbit, it was the only way to be sure.

Norway had Christine Guldbrandsen singing about pixies and fairies and woodland things. Nearly made me puke. Bring in the chainsaws please. Yes, it was a traditional song, which was good performance wise, but on looking at the lyrics I suddenly had this urge to go and chop some trees down, find a pixie and burn its wings off.

Then to Spain and Las Ketchup with their song ‘Bloody Mary’. They were dressed all in red they start their performance slumped on office chairs as two dancers frolic around them. Looked like they were looking to do some ‘business’, if you know what I mean. I rremarked they looked like the Spanish version of the spice girls. I was overruled by one friend who stated ‘No, they are not the spice girls, they are .. … … the Salsa Girls.’ Sure enough there was spicey salsa, hot salsa, chilli salsa and extra chunky salsa. You can make up your own minds which is which.

Malta’s Fabrizio Faniello sang ‘I Do’. Malta has never won the contest, and the reason is clear. SHITE. It was allegedly a dance track with four energetic dancers struting their stuff behind him to try and disguise the fact the song is drivel and he is not a she with few clothes on. Oh, oh, oh what an image. My head is ready to explode. Sparks shot into the air on the key change, which made me happy ‘cause I knew the song was nearly over. Nil point.

Germany’s Texas Lightning, fronted by an Australian singer, provide us eurovisionphiles with an American-influenced country song. Bizarre. Catchy. Luminous cacti. Pink cowboy boots. Grand ol Opry tweeness. Wonderful. Brilliant. We loved it. Well done, Germany.

Denmark went for an American theme with Sidsel’s song ‘Twist of Love’ and giving an image of ‘Happy Days’. Lots of energy, interesting dance moves, not bad. She really looked like the twin sister of Amanda Holden.

Then what must be the gay icon of Russia, it was Dima who sang a crap ballet ballad and had as his diversion a half lady-half piano thing on stage with ballet dancers in the background looking too much like a last minute edition. No naked ladies. It was shite. I wanted to pull out my eyeballs and stuff them in my ears.

Then the song ‘Ninanajna’ by Elena Risteska from FYR Macedonia. It’s a decent enough tune. We all agreed, she was the eastern version of Beyonce with lots of hip gyrataion and bum wiggling. Every prepubescent boys dream. And before you ask I am not prepubescent, but I can dream. Good performance.

Mihai Trăistariu from Romania sings ‘Tornero’. He has a high voice, must be those tight undergarments. Lots of energy. It was OK. Girls were nice-ish. A contender.
‘Layla’ by Hari Mata Hari of Bosnia & Herzegovina was next. It was ok. No real thoughts either way on this one. Good for background music as it is one of those songs that just builds and builds.


Lithuanian band LT United sang ‘We Are The Winners’ with an aggressive, tub-thumping energy that really got us going. Absolute genius. Loved every minute and called for more after they had finished. Which was silly as we were watching TV, so who the hell was going to hear us???? Excellent stuff though.

Then Daz Sampson from the United Kingdom who looks like a thin, energetic Gaza. The song ‘Teenage Life’ had girls in school uniform in it, which is always a good start, but they ended up more like Nora Batty than Britney Speers. ‘No sex please, we’re british’ rang through my head. It is an annoyingly catchy tune, just as the chicken song from Spitting Image was. My warped personality liked it, but only just.

Then it was the turn of Anna Vissi of Greece. Making full use of both a smoke machine and a wind machine, Anna puts her heart and soul into the performance of ‘Everything’, a classic Eurovision ballad full of drama and melodrama. Towards the end, she falls to her knees and sings at the top of her lungs. The audience goes absolutely crazy.

Then, with our anticipation rising like a slow bat out of hell it was the turn of Lordi from Finland. Mr Lordi, we want to get on board your Lordi Express and drive that engine along the tracks of complete success. Mr Lordi was dressed to the hilt with skulls on his kneecaps whose eyes light up red, his microphone is attached to the handle of a battleaxe and he has devil horns protruding from his head. Then there is Amen, the unstoppable mummified assassin guitar wielder of the group. Hope he didn’t give the other contestants tomb rot. Kita is the extra dimensional alien drummer who has the energy and lovability of Animal from the mumpets. Keep banging those drums. Awa is the cute(?) possessed witch, she devil on the keyboards. She actually looks a bit like a deformed Klingon, but what’s that amongst friends, eh? Last but by no means least there is OX ‘the Bulltaurus’ who is the bassist. When I roleplay, especially Werewolf the Apocolypse I have a character called Ox. So I feel a slight, non- stalker affinity with Lordi’s bassist. The athen’s crowd loved them, as did we. You might be able to tell from this post and previous posts, we wanted Lordi to win. Lots of explosions and Mr Lordi growing a pair of wings set the whole thing off nicely. What a performance. Encore. 10/10

Tina Karol from Ukraine was next, which may have been unfair as we were still on a high from the performance of Lordi. Her song ‘Show Me Your Love’ is a nice catchy dance tune. Pretty girl.
Then came the depressing shite from France’s Virginie Pouchain singing a ballad that was bollocks. Yah, boo, sucked. ZZZzzzzzzzzz. Plus she sang in French. The only contestant to do so. All the others either sang in their mother tongue, or, mostly, sang in English.


Croatia was next with Severnia performing ‘Moja štikla’ – Severnia wore a red dress, flamenco style until she obligingly tore it off. MMMmmmmm, nice. She did have a disturbingly wide smile which brought me back to images of ‘V’. Apart from that, a decent show.

Then it was the turn of Ireland’s Brian Kennedy, who sang ‘Every Song Is A Cry For Love’. More like ‘every song he sings which is his own brings in more mullah for him’. It was utterly pretentious shite and Ireland has made it very obvious it does not want to win the Eurovision song contest for a few more years.

Carola from Sweden is a bit of an oldie, but still looks a stunner. Her song ‘Invincible’ was decent even though she looked like she was wrapped in kitchen tinfoil that was then painted gold.

Sibel Tüzün from Turkey then sang ‘Superstar’. She scared me by looking like a Pink/Madonna crossed with a tattooed boxer. The music was ok I think ‘cause all I could think of was her being scary.

Finally came a bondage inspired song by Andre of Armenia. It was a bizarre mix of dancing around a box/table and being tied up in knots. It was Ok but not terribly impressed by it all.

THE VOTE
Then came the voting after another rendition of a song by last year’s winner and the two hosts telling everybody over and over how ‘amazing’ everybody is. They looked like bunny rabbits caught in the headlights of an oncoming juggernaught. If only.


The voting took place in due course over 10 minutes. I made a few calls for Finnland and Lithuania.

At the end of the 10 minutes the usual tour round the countries started. We were shocked at first at how well Lordi were doing. Then it became clear that we were all on the Lordi Express to Winsville.

Lordi came out top with 292 points, 44 points ahead of their nearest rival, Russia.

Lordi came. Lordi rocked. Lordi conquered.

Friday, 19 May 2006

Eurovision Rocks out this Year

Every year now we have a Eurovision party to enjoy laughing hysterically at people trying to sing in a european competition to see who has the best song.

The best bits are usually the freaky singers and songs and Terry Wogans commentary, which is legendary in the UK. One year Xena warrior princess won the comp!! This year looks even better.


If you can you have to vote for the entry from Finland. Lordi are a heavy metal band from Finland and they have to win. It is the only way.

Vote for Lordi. You can listen to their entry below.



Tuesday, 16 May 2006

My Wanderings in Mordheim

My Warband of DwarvesWell, I put my warband together, went to TTN and had a fight. And lost. Again.

I have just started to play Mordheim with the Warhammer Guys at TTN and I decided to play dwarves.

Mordheim is a cross between the fantasy world of Warhammer and the skirmish style game of Necromunda. If you have absolutely no idea what I am yammering on about try the links and have a look see.

Essentially, you control a warband looking for a substance called wyrdstone in the ruined city of Mordheim. You fight other warbands for control of these lumps of wyrdstone which can be traded to give your warband gold with which to improve its lot. All the while your heroes and henchment can earn experience to buy skills or try to obtain characteristic advances.

Yes I am a grown up. Yes I like playing with toy soldiers. It beats watching ‘Loose Women' or ‘Emmerdale’ on TV.

Anyway, I nipped into Games Moneyshop and bought a few miniatures that looked like good characters and brought them home to paint.

Ce Voila

DwarfLeader
My Warband of Dwarves


I am pretty proud of the paint jobs, though a couple of the minis still need to be finished off. But I was happy.

This Monday night was the second night of Mordheim, the previous Monday I had played with my dwarves and I lost. Twice.

Though to be fair I only had 4 in my warband and I had been stupid in the initial outlay. In Mordheim you get 500 gold pieces with which to buy your warband and equipment. I went the munchkin route and tooled my group out with lots of cool stuff, that cost a fortune and hence I could not afford too many in my warband. It was pointed out to me but I stubbornly decided that I would plough on regardless of the consequences – its what a dwarf would do, isn’t it??

Ahhhhh, the naivety of innocence. All the other warbands had about 7 to 10 figures and at least half had bows. Dwarves can only move 3 inches, mostly everyone else moves 4 inches. My dwarves had pistols that shoot 9 inches (my engineer helps them shoot this far as pistols can only normally fire 6 inches) while bows can fire 24 inches plus. Can you see a pattern developing?? Yup, my warband get to become full blown pin cushions by the third round.

So last week I got trounced, first by the ratmen, the skaven (nose twitching little bastards) and the second time by the orcs (green skinned smelly bastards). Mind you a number of us were learning the rules and I think some things were stacked against my troupe due to inappropriate forgetting of advantageous rules. Bugger.

This week I fought the undead, and the undead won. Arse. Feck. Drink. Feck. I had bought another figure so I now had 2 troll slayers. My warband is up to five.

Unfortunately in the previous week my first troll slayer got really smacked hard and ended up in with a pit fighter who took one look at him, laughed and gave him a Glaswegian kiss that hurt so bad the troll slayer had his movement reduced to 2 inches. My leader also got seriously smacked but just ended up with frenzy.

The latest foray was after I watched a good old grudge match between the undead and the orcs.

My Warband of DwarvesMy Warband of DwarvesMy Warband of DwarvesThe game seemed to be fairly even for a while but eventually the vampire and her groupies not only wiped the orcs off the board, but killed the orc leader. Not finished there, the undead decided to really rub salt into the wounds but raising the orc leader as one of their own.

I ended up fighting a different group of undead. Their vampire leader had the skill Sprint so he could run triple distance, a whole 12 inches. By the third round I had just moved close to a wyrdstone token when the vampire strolled up to say hello, leaving his zombies still at the edge of the table. Grrrrrrrr, went my dwarf leader as he went into frenzy and stupidly charged the vampire who had frenzy as well. Only his attacks were sitting at 4. Frenzy doubles your attack characteristic, So while my mighty dwarf had the massive number of 1 attack doubled to a whopping 2 plus 2 hand to hand weapons gave him a grand total of 3 attacks (not Bad at all) the vamp had a grand total of 9. Arse.

I almost got the bastard. Almost. But I didn’t and he put two of my dwarves out of action in as many seconds. Meanwhile, his zombies were still shuffling up the board.

I caved in and ran like the spineless chicken shit I was.

With his warband rating of massive and mine of piss ant size I got mucho extra experience plus I found some slaves wandering around Mordheim (silly billies) and one decided to join my warband. So now I have another to swell the ranks pushing my numbers now to the staggering heights of 6.

Next week, I will mostly be playing Blood Bowl. And I will put up a report next week on the exploits of the ‘Wasteland Greenskins’. Huzzah!!

Wednesday, 10 May 2006

BOOK REVIEW: Never come between a Dwarf and Revenge

Grudge BearerHaving been drawn back to the Games Moneyshop for no real apparent reason ….. OK, OK I wanted to get a couple of Dwarf miniatures to use for a Mordheim game and I was curious to find something to read as well.

I found
Grudgebearer, a book about the dwarves of Warhammer setting. I purchased the book and minis and promptly started the reading frenzy.

Grudgebearer is written by Gav Thorpe, who will be a well known name in Games Workshop circles as the chief game developer of the Warhammer design team. He has also written a batch of stories for the bimonthly anthology Inferno! (which may or may not be dead now), a number of other novels and he also worked on the Inquisitor game.

The blurb on the back of the book goes as follows,


Dwarf King Throndin Stoneheart of Zhufbar is dead; betrayed upon the field of
battle. as his son barundin takes up the mantle of King, he must fulfil a mighty
oath of vengeance. In an epic tale that spans centuries, Grudge Bearer follows
Barundin as he battles his way through enemies on a desperate quest to avenge
the wrongs against his father and save his people from a terrible war against
the dark forces of Chaos

Interesting, I thought.

Basically Barundin fights beside his dad, dad is killed when allies run like the clappers from a battle with orcs, White Dwarf appears then disappears a couple of times, Barundin declares a grudge against said allies, becomes king of Zhufbar, has a fight against skaven lasting 17 years or so, tracks down a rogue dwarf engineer for the Zhufbar Guilds as said engineer blew up the dwarf holds brewery (sacrilege), engineer comes back and makes amends, dwarves attack goblins and have a big fight to reclaim an overrun dwarf hold, Barundin gets a sharp axe to kill things with as a present from his dead dad (only took 170 years to make!), wants to get married, finds a female to marry, goes on stag do and brings back a dwarf version of a traffic cone, has nasty hang over, gets told to cancel wedding, goes to try and sort out problem so he can get married and ‘get some loving’, has a big fight with chaos marauders and evil dwarves, wins and gets told by the Slayer King to piss off home and have a good shag.

I have to say overall, I enjoyed the novel as it was easy to read and small. A good holiday read, you might say. Gav isn’t a bad writer, and he does go into a bit of nice description. I think the subject matter was difficult and Gav didn’t quite hit the mark with this novel.

The characters float between one dimensional and two dimensional. It is excellent background material for the dwarves of Warhammer and feels a little like Gav was asked to write a wee bit of a background story for the Dwarf Army source book and he got carried away.

The whole episode takes place over a period of about 70 years and I can understand why he did not want to write about every little bit of life but it did feel like something was missing.

Tharundin feels like a Conan with a height inferiority complex as between fighting, threatening to fight, killing, threatening to kill, drinking, killing, drinking, and fighting he seems to constantly brood.

There are a few parodies thrown in, though no where near the number in Blood Bowl, that did fit – though I really think they are taking the piss when a mountain with a bad reputation for being the home of goblins and orcs is called Mount Gunbad is a tad close to Tolkien’s Mount Gundabad which is a mountain with a bad reputation for being the home of goblins and orcs. But then Warhammer always did have a certain ‘tongue in cheek’ mischievousness.

Again bad editing, as with Blood Bowl, let the book down a bit.

Gav, nice book, really enjoyed the background, just didn’t grip me as a story.

I would give this book a 5 out of 10. It wasn’t bad, I did read it all, it just didn’t really stand out and there was not a lot of character development.

Oh, yes, the proof readers in the
Black Library need glasses.



Friday, 5 May 2006

Your comments please

I have been trying to make the blog more user friendly and i need feedback.

If you have any comments on the layout, functionality, look, and/or content please leave a comment. Its dead easy to do and you don't have to register with blogger.

I also promise to have more game related material up soon. Mostly i have just been raving about everyday crap.

Thanks.

Thursday, 4 May 2006

Table Top North Pub Quiz

Table Top North is holding a pub quiz tomorrow night, Friady 5th May 2006 at 8pm in the Boat Club, Belfast. The Boat club is smokefree and has a bar. What more could you need for a pub quiz where you can still breathe at the end of the night.

The event is NOT restricted to TTN members, and feel free to bring friends and family who have no interest in gaming. TTN has promised that there will be no geeky games questions!

There are no official team size restrictions (but fellow contestants may object to a team of 20). Entry is £1.50 for TTN members, £2.00 for everyone else.

Doors open at 7.00pm and the quiz will get under way at 8.00pm.

Wednesday, 3 May 2006

Some new changes to the blog

I am continually rejigging this blog with little widgets and this is just the latest with the blog cutting long posts down and adding an expandable post function.

If you want to find out more go to blogger for dummies

Tuesday, 2 May 2006

Chris Moyles - Listen you will, very funny he is

I was listening to Chris Moyles this morning on Radio one.

If you can tune into Radio 0ne on 97-99FM, or on your digital or on the web then, listen to the Chris Moyles Show. It should be made compulsory by the Government. It would be the one good piece of legislation Blair would ever come up with.

Chris and his crew (Comedy Dave, Rachel, Dom and Aled) just make me want to wet my pants. Which is not good when you are in your wife’s new car driving on the M2 into Belfast. Indeed I have to thank Wifey for turning me away from my news junkyism of listening to BBC Radio Ulster and onto Chris. I now feel much cheerier walking in through the front door of my work.

Well, today Chris phoned his friend, Longman, of Longman Sandwiches. I would probably drop in to have a sandwich but Longman’s shop is in Rothwell, Leeds and I live in Ballyclare, so unfortunately I can not plug how delicious his sandwiches are. Pooper.

Anyway, go to Longman’s site and check out his ‘Great Wall of Barry’ and vote for your favourite. I voted for Barry Scott of Cillit Bang fame.

Saturday, 29 April 2006

Google maps are go!!!

Yahhh!!!!

I have finally made the map thing work with the little pins.

My heartfelt thanks goes to Richard at www.donkeymagic.co.uk/googlemap for making it easy for me to finish the map off.

Anyone form NI let me know where your group meets and i will pop it onto the map.

Where did the week go?????

Hmmm, well I didn't realise the week could go in so quickly, but it has.

I haven't been posting because i have mainly been obsessed by google maps and the programming behind it. You may have noticed an off and on map during the week. This is because i have been trying to put those bloody map pins on the map and it has not been working.

I have given up for the moment, but i will be back to this one.


Other than that work was boring and my blood bowl team did OK with a 1-1 draw against the Gang Green Ganstas (damn you Trev!!!!!), however, Grunhilda, one of the Bull Centaurs on my team, was brutally hacked to death by a cheatin' bastard orc. Did i get pay back??? Did I hell. I wonder who's next in line for me to have a go at, or get crushed by?

Monday, 24 April 2006

Bloody Hell! Blood Bowl the novel

I was suckered into the dark domain of my local Games Workshop, er, shop the other day and convinced myself to purchase a copy of ‘Blood Bowl’ by Matt Forbeck, an American writer I believe. I have long been a fan of the game of Blood Bowl and I am currently joining the TableTopNorthleague for ’06.

So was it worth the dosh? Well, i did go and buy the second book, ‘Dead Bowl’, for another evening's read. So is this a ringing endorsement of a series that I go back the next day to get the other one?

Not really.

Now I like Blood Bowl, its backstabbing, the gore, the power, the evil deals, the destruction, the disembowelling, and that’s just in the locker room. So in that respect the books are good.

When I was in the GW shop a guy sitting painting a miniature said he had read them and found himself laughing out loud and that they were very funny. All I can say is dear god, don’t let him go near a Terry Pratchett or Tom Holt book, he will explode.

OK, the books are funny, but only in the wry smile very odd groan come chuckle kind of way, not the maniacal laughter induced by Mr Pratchett or Mr Holt or Mr Rankin (Robert that is, in his Apocolyse the Musical time traveling sprout kind of way). There are puns flying all over the place, parodying real life people and places. There are in jokes on American Football, apparently, but I wouldn’t know cause I’m not American. I did play American football when I was wee. Much fun we had in smacking each other around. It resembled less American Football and more the Kindergarten version of Blood Bowl…. But I digress.

There are GW puns, some of which I get. Then there are puns from UK real life. Which I found interesting.

The hero of both books (Blood Bowl & Dead Bowl) is Dunkel ‘Dunk’ Hoffnung, a reluctant Blood Bowl recruit persuaded to stop fighting dragons, where he will end up poor and dead, and join the ranks of Blood Bowl players where he will end up rich and dead.

His agent is a Halfling called ‘Slick’ Fullbelly, who recruits him for the Bad Bay Hackers (I may be a bit slow but I did get this one – if you are not up on American football check a team called the Green Bay Packers).

Book one – Blood Bowl

It actually starts off quite well. I wonder if Matt read Pratchett???. I liked it. It set the scene very well, with a little of human nature gazing thrown in.

Then it moved on to Dunk joining the Hackers and the hilarious antics that ensue, or not hilarious antics as the case may be. He fights against insurmountable odds, becomes the best friend of the team Ogre, has a fight with an evil spellcaster, is threatened by a Black Orc desperate to keep his all time completion record, falls in love with the catcher of the Reikland Reavers while he meets up with his brother after a falling out who just happens to be the Reavers star thrower, gets embroiled in match fixing, stands up to the ‘Black Jerseys’, gets thrown out of a game for killing the team captain of the Chaos All-Stars at half time, has a bounty on his head from the Games Wizards, gets framed for murder, catches the real murderer, gets drunk, gets laid, and gets to the final of the Blood Bowl. Phew.

Not to mention the wonderful commentary from Bob and Jim.

It is a good tale, it kept my interest for the evening, indeed enough for me to go and buy ‘Dead Bowl’. It is like one of those movies you watch to zone out and not to think.

Now the bits that left me unfulfilled.

The editing is atrocious.

  1. Camera is constantly misspelled as camra.
  2. At one point Dunk is talking to M’Grash. Then its Dirk. Then its back to Dunk. Yet Dirk is not in this conversation. Sloppy.
  3. Very few games described, but it’s not a major gripe.
  4. The humour was very hit and miss, and even when it hit it was a bit cheesy.
  5. Only Dunk seems to be vaguely 3D.

Overall, I have to give the book a 6 out of 10. For all it’s faults I had to keep reading. Damn you Matt!!!!!

I would recommend it to readers. It’s a good pulp fiction type book and fun(ish) to read.

Matt, it’s a good effort, fair play for taking that step forward to put it in the public domain and wish you the best in the future.

I will review Dead Bowl at a later date.

Friday, 21 April 2006

Forum is here.....log in if you can be arsed

Well i have the Wee Gamers Forum finally up and running.

Not sure if it will work, but what the hell?


I will fiddle around for the time being. And i am looking for an more permanent ad free area for this whole project to reside.

Some day, maybe.

And lo, tis Friday already! And getting ready for Q-Con

Yaaay, its Friday again, the weekend starts at 5pm today. I just have to get through work.

I also got some notification about Q-Con 13. Q-Con is THE RPG and gaming convention in Northern Ireland. In fact its the only one. Who needs choices?

Q-Con 13
Last year I helped out my friend Trev running a Games Workshop LOTR game. I really enjoyed the test runs.

Trev is thinking of doing the same again this year, so (and here is the tester for how many people actually read this damn blog) if you are going to Q-Con look for the LOTR miniatures game. I'll be the short one. Come and say hello.

Wednesday, 19 April 2006

So much time wasting to be done, so little time to do it in.

Well happy bloody Easter, or whatever you wish to call shoving chocolate eggs down your throat in a rabid orgy of excessive chocolate consumption.

I sound a little like a hum bug but I am not really. Just fancied the rant, seeing as I have not been online for a few days. Thought i had caved in, eh??

I have been doing some DIY in the house and now have my cubby hole completed (including surround sound). I am also 'wifi man' using a Linksys WAG54GS system. Don't I sound so up to speed with technical products? No? What do ya mean No?

All right, all right. I had finished the box room which would be my office (i.e. where i could store all my crap with the proviso that anything outside my said office would be summarily burnt by wifey.). This Office is next to the room where the computer used to be and there was a telephone extension in that room. Hmmmmm, minor problem now. I had a sudden epiphany of this when i had moved everything into my office and found nowhere to pug my modem into. Bugger.

Would it mean a little trip to the mighty B&Q to purchase telephone extension cable and the judicious use of my trusty electric drill? It started out that way, until as fate would have it we were sucked into the vortex called PC World in Lisburn (sorry, City of Lisburn). Lo, in front of our unworthy eyes we didst find the treasure of wirelessness connectivity to the mighty broadband that is Wanadoo. At £64 we thought (see how i am transferring guilt of forking out money for a luxury by merely replacing the incriminating word 'I' with the word 'we'?) what the hell? We will go wireless. So after being sucked in to buying a cute optical mouse that glowed and an aluminium keyboard (it had to be done) off we went home. We arrived back mid afternoon, later at midnight I nearly threw the thing out of the window. It just would not work for me.

Next day techno geek Rob arrived double clicked here, double clicked there, entred a couple of letters and bingo, i am online within 3 minutes. I jumped with Joy, gave him a manly hug like they do at football matches when their team has finally won a match after 20 years of failing to score a goal, or when Northern Ireland beat, yes BEAT, England 1-0 in 2005 (i was well happy).

So anyway, it confirmed to me 2 things
  1. It is easy to answer the question when you know the answer.
  2. I am a technological ludite.

Mind you, I..... We also went to ASDA for some essentials on the Shore Road in Belfast and i picked up a decent surround sound system for under £30 (though how it will continue working remains to be seen, it is only £30!!). I would slap my arse twice but i am sitting down, so I won't. Not bad at all now that my little hive nest of gaming essentials is ready. Lovely jubbly.

Friday, 14 April 2006

The internet is for pr0n .... W.O.W. style



what? what?? Ok, what do YOU really have it for?? (Thats mostly to the guys)

Thursday, 13 April 2006

You will be happy, citizen

OK, I used to play Paranoia, before it followed Bill Gates to become Paranoia XP. It is the most extremely violent, backstabing, distrustful encouraging and high body count role playing game i have ever played. The Die Hard body counts just do not come close.

It is also the most funny, side splitting, tongue in cheek game i have ever played (A very special thanks to Rob for introducing me to it!!) Names are hilarious too. My usual name was COM-R-AD. The middle letter describes your security clearance, which is all colour coded. You are going to have a short life if you are a commie, a mutant, a traitor, or all of the above. All players at at least one of the above, but its OK you have clones who appear when you die and then become you until yet another unfortunate accident near the food vats. Starting to get the picture?? If the link to Paranoia does not work or you want more, just bloody well Google it then, you lazy git.

Well, anyway, this company called Polaris from India are investing in Northern Ireland. Thay are an IT company working on software blah blah techno babble blah blah zzzzzzzzz.

Now a lot of my friends are in the software industry in 'guid aul Norn Iron' and, well, apart form the role players (Of course!) they seem a little lack lustre in the interesting department. So a friend checked out Polaris and found out how they MAKE their people have FUN.

You will comply. Be happy citizen or report to the Termination centre

Wednesday, 12 April 2006

numa numa numa numa numa

The evidence that some people should not be allowed access to the internet.

http://www.jeffiscool.com/numanuma.html


It is a fantastic lip sync rendition of the numa numa song.

Made me laugh.

Tuesday, 11 April 2006

Still here.

Well, i have survived the weekend and the dreaded 'Monday'.

Still looking at putting together a bulletin board, but i have not looked at it for a few days. I want to get it right, and of course have enough people sign up to make it viable. No use in making a BB if no one will use it, eh?

Missed Table Top North last night, bit miffed 'cause work got in the way of a good game of Game Workshop's Lord of the Rings. Ah, well there is always next week. I am currently signing up to play in the TTN Blood Bowl League. I will use wifey's team, the Battleaxe Bluebelles, who are Chaos Dwarves. I will try to get some photos to put up.

Back to work for me, ho hum.

Sunday, 9 April 2006

I know Kung Fu.... So i kick you ass

Kung Fu HustleOk, wifey hit the jackpot this weekend, when she went to Tesco she found a little dvd ffor moi, called Kung Fu Hustle.

I had heard of it before but had never seen it.
Wifey does not like blood of any kind....... at all........ ever. So i sat down in the living room, switched the tv and the PS2 on, slotted in the dvd and sat back. Dear God almighty. I never laughed so much, followed a plot or love the kung fu kick ass action.

See the Matrix?? It sucks hard boiled eggs in an old peoples home compared to this.
I could go into a big rave of the film but i think you should check it out for yourself.

Friday, 7 April 2006

Yah....I have survived until Friday

TFI Friday.

The blog has lasted until the weekend. Splendid. Thanks to everyone who has visited, but please if you vist please leave a bloody comment!

Also it would really be great if you could link to me from your own website or blogspot, that is if you have one.


Just to get you through the weekend why not try a little heavy country

http://www.hayseed-dixie.com/ace.mov

Thursday, 6 April 2006

Spanking the monkey

No. This is not pervy and completely workplace friendly.

Just Spank the Monkey and see how fast you can see the monkey fly.


My top speed is 310. Yeah, boogie on down, baby.

Left turn, Clyde!!

If you like Warhammer 40K like i do and you have a sense of humour, which you must have if you are reading this web presence which laughingly refers to itself as a 'blog' then you will like Turn Signals on a Land Raider.

It is one of the best 40k parody comics i have ever come across. Although admittedly, i have not come across many. Ok so i am doing a bad job at selling this to you. Just visit it and have a look. Some of the comic sketches are mediocre but in the main it is very good. Not sure how non-40K gamers will view it, but it should even vaguely intrigue ordinary wargamers to at least curling the sides of their mouths in a small grin.

Wednesday, 5 April 2006

Crazy dog goes .... well, crazy

And this dog has some serious issues to sort out

Crazy dog.

The Simpsons - for real, dude

Okay, okay, okay.

Try this one for the real thing

The Simpsons

Great, init??

Bloody hell .... the guy's a whizz kid on the geeetar

Just go to this link. Just do it. Yes, now.

Geeetar boy playz ze classical muuzic

Did you sit staring at the guy??? I did. Wow!

It suddenly makes me want to break his fingers.

Why? Why? What madness is this?

PHP Bulletin Board
Ok, i am going to try something a little different very soon. I am thinking of putting up a bulleting board. Yes, that is right a bulleting board (BBs). Dear God only knows why i am about to plunge into this madness, but i shall have a go.

Everybody seems to be a members of any number of BBs, which cover anything and everything.

I have no idea why i want to put up a BB other than "I can, therefore I will". Its not as if the web hasn't enough of the bloody things.

Maybe i shouldn't. Nah, i will. I shall have a bulleting board and it shall be called Wee Gamers also (Like the continuity thing going on???)

I have looked around and of course being a right tight arse and general stingy bastard when it comes to giving somebody else my hard earned dosh, I have found a number of free BB hosters. I have started one with PHPBB for free because it uses PHPBB software, with which i am familiar. Table Top North uses it for its forum. You can download the free PHPBB software from its own website at, bizarrely enough, PHPBB.

I have just started it and will stick up a link to it at some stage. I feel like an information junky now, constantly checking the BBs i am a member of or checking my email inbox for new emails. God, when did the world suddenly become so obsessed with the speed of information??

Tuesday, 4 April 2006

I hear the groans of the dead.......

Urban Dead
I am currently playing a MMORPG called Urban Dead in which you create a character to run around a city either 1) trying to kill zombies and stay alive or 2) kill living people and stay, er, undead.

Its fairly nifty with a maximum storage of 50 turns and one turn recovered every half hour.


Its easy to set up a character and fun to play when really bored or at work(?)

Time Wasting ....... big style

If you, like me, have a short attention span but can be completely obsessive whilst engaged by something new (I usually last a week of obsessive compulsive motivated activity sparkled off by the latest fad or whatever - like this blog!) then i might suggest reading some webcomics.

Order of the Stick

My favourite at the moment is the Order of the Stick. It is a brilliant comic about a group of misfits from DnD 3.5 edition on their various quests. There are a lot of DnD injokes but i think anyone who is even vaguely aware of DnD should enjoy it. My favourite character in the comic is Belkar, the halfing ranger of very dubious alignment (mostly chaotic) who obsesses about killing things and carries around a sheet of lead so that no one can cast Know Alignment on him (He takes this very personally and feels it is an insult to his cultural background viewing it as ethnically and culturally repressive behaviour)

Monday, 3 April 2006

Dawn of War


Been playing Dawn of War on and off for a while now. Quite good with the Winter Assualt expansion.

I completed the main game and am slowly struggling to complete Winter Assault in between life, work and other interests that don't involve sitting square eyed at a computer.

I am not entirely sold on the good and evil campaigns, where you flit from one army to the other. In the good campaign you play both Imperials and Eldar. Bloody pansy elves in space! Load of nonsense.

I am as always being utterly stuffed by some bloody 10 year old kid from god knows where when playing online.

I like the the online playing, except for the losing thing, that really sucks.



Suckyitis is rampant at Decipher

Decipher will probably not be supporting LOTR the RPG anymore. It is being discussed on one of their Lord of the Rings RPG Forum Boards and it is pretty much accepted by the LOTR community that Decipher management are currently putting the entire operation at risk (alledgedly!).

I am very sad to see this happening as the LOTR game is quite a good one (except the combat).

Heyho. You can keep up with fan based material at the Hall of Fire website It really is an excellent production and is free.

It could be back to using MERP at some stage. Or GURPS which could be interesting.

I am running a campaign at the moment using LOTR rules set in T.A. 2941 and started at the Battle of the Five Armies. Might put some sort of update on it here, if i can be arsed! :)

The road goes ever on..........

Hello there and welcome to my (probably infrequent) blog.

Haven't got a clue why I am doing this, other than I have seen everyone else do it.

We will see how this little project goes.

I am a RPGer and am a member of
Table Top North. Check it out if you want to constructively waste a bit of time.

Northern Ireland is a great wee place with loads of inspiration for roleplaying and wargaming and if you need a little inspiration check out the Discover Northern Ireland website.